Weird AF News
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Weird AF News
Comedian Jonesy covers weird news 5 days/week and on Friday it's only Florida.
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22 Buddhist monks busted smuggling drugs at the airport. Price of condoms going up as the war strangles condom supply chain.
Price of condoms is going up as the Iran war strangles the condom supply chain. French teenager faces jailtime for licking a vending machine in Singap...
Floridaman tried to trade an alligator for tacos at the drive-thru. Florida teacher twerked in front of the class again.
FLORIDA FRIDAY - Florida substitute teacher fired after twerking in class and calling herself the, "Million Dollar Prostitute". Florida woman escapes...
Japanese man jailed for spoiling Godzilla movie. Fighter jets in Korea collide because pilots took selfies.
Japanese man jailed for spoiling a Godzilla movie. Fighter jets collide in South Korea because pilots were taking selfies. Polymarket bettor may hav u...
Drinking cow pee is required at this Indian temple. Cocaine in the rivers is getting salmon very high.
Oldest temple in India makes it mandatory for all visitors to drink cow pee in order to prove their devotion. Three women on trial for using sex toys...
Arson suspect arrived at police interview with burnt eyebrows. Animal Rights Activist rescues and releases restaurant lobster back into the sea.
Arson suspect arrived at police interview with burnt eyebrows. Germantown police issue citywide warning over annual Nerf Gun Wars. Animal Rights Activ...
Titanic museum floods on the anniversary of ships sinking. Japan government pays citizens to use Tinder dating app.
Police arrest California man that replaced over $30k worth of Legos with pasta. In Japan, the Government will pay you to use Tinder. Titanic museum ex...
Florida woman arrested for twerking for tips at 7-11. Floridaman "gets horny", drove around exposing himself in boss's van.
FLORIDA FRIDAY - Florida woman arrested after twerking for tips at a 7-1 1 store. Florida woman tells police driving at 123mph is legal because she dr...
Genital disappearance scam leads to 10 men arrested. Cocaine hippos in Columbia will be put down.
Cocaine hippos on Pablo Escobar's estate in Columbia will be culled. Swiss cheesemakers will be allowed to put artificial holes in their cheese. 10 pe...
Pretending to be gay is a popular way to stay in the UK (this rhymes). Amazon employee annoyingly dies while working.
UK lawyers helping migrants pretend they're gay in order to obtain asylum. Amazon employee perished on the warehouse floor while employees continued w...
Man in cow costume stabs family members. GLP-1 users report new side effect: DIVORCE!
Man dressed in a cow costume stabbed a family member in New York. GLP-1 users report a whole new side effect - divorce. US troops drank 1 million gall...
Come get this sausage! (from a vending machine?). US wants to hire gamers as air traffic controllers.
Hundreds of chimpanzees are embroiled in a civil war. US government wants to hire gamers to fill vacant air traffic controller positions. 24 hour meat...
Florida woman wrestles a manatee in a bikini at a park. Floridaman goes to job interview, leaves with assault charges.
FLORIDA FRIDAY - Floridaman banned from Disney World after bringing in a fat waller full of cocaine. Floridaman goes to job interview at Burger King,...
Instead of baptizing, a pastor drowns a grown man in a kiddie pool. Lady bashed relative in head with hammer for stealing her brother's ashes.
Lady smashed relative in the head with a pink hammer for stealing her brother's ashes. Mount Everest accused of poisoning foreign climbers to force fa...
Giant Phallus Festival in Japan hits hard. Banana bandits stole 96 bananas from a gas station.
Banana bandits stole 96 bananas from a WaWa gas station. South African politician went snorkeling in a large pothole to bring attention to city issues...
Is the Boston accent disappearing? "Lonely Death Epidemic" is affecting old Japanese men.
"God you're hot", says a Tennessee school board member to a high school student live on a streaming public meeting. Study shows that 37% of Japanese m...
Family finds a skull while hunting for Easter eggs. Lady stabs another lady that was living in a chicken coop with her father.
Family finds a human skull while hunting for Easter eggs. Lady stabs another lady that was living in a chicken coop with her father. Religious fanatic...
Florida woman burns down husband's home to rekindle relationship. Floridaman drunk drove onto airport runway, tries to steal two planes.
FLORIDA FRIDAY - Florida woman lights husband's house on fire to rekindle their relationship. Florida detective reprimanded after farting into a colle...
Scientists create 5 psychedelic drugs from single tobacco plant. Bob Marley's deadlock up for auction.
Oldest animal in the world is still alive following Crypto death hoax. Bob Marley's dreadlock to be sold at auction. Scientists created 5 psychedelic...
Powerball lottery winner arrested for robbing a home. Chocolate bars recalled for being spike with viagra.
$167million lottery winner arrested for robbing a home in Kentucky. California chocolate being recalled for being spiked with Viagra. County locks the...
Mother slept with twin brothers - who's child is this? World's largest vampire theme park planned in Romania.
Mother slept with twin brothers and can't tell who her child's father is. Mayonnaise has now been classified as a musical instrument by researchers. W...
Thieves steal 12 tons of KitKat bars right before Easter. Customized bong built into a dashboard of man's truck leads to arrest.
12 tons of KitKat candy bars were stolen in a big chocolate heist. Nearly 200 sailors were caught doing hard drugs on British nuclear submarines. Man...
Florida woman urinated on furniture and appliances in multiple Airbnb's. Florida man has Rolex stolen by hooker with "Dream Girl" neck tattoo.
FLORIDA FRIDAY - Floridaman has his Rolex watch stolen by a Florida woman with "Dream Gril" neck tattoo. Florida woman named "Candy Land" was sentence...
Professor proposes to student in the middle of class and receives a beat down by students. Philly breaks world record for longest cheesesteak(s).
Professor in India proposed to student in middle of class and then received a beat down by students on campus. Lion King composer sues comedian/podcas...
Stalker broke into a home and sucked on a woman's toes. Boner Bear Honey ED syrup banned from gas stations.
Man arrested and sentenced 6 years for breaking into a home and sucking on a woman's toes. Scientists discover the age children become cunning little...
Quadruple amputee professional cornhole player shot a man while driving. Russian women who don't want kids will be sent to psychologist.
Russian woman who don't want children will be sent to the Government Psychologist. A quadruple amputee and professional cornhole player shot a man whi...
Father and son banned from donating sperm after fathering 600 kids. Cocaine sharks thrive in the Bahamas.
Sharks in Bahamas filled with cocaine, painkillers and caffeine. Barbie Dolls contaminated with fentanyl in Missouri. Father and son are banned from d...
Floridaman can still marry his cousin after marriage ban fails to pass. Florida woman refuses to leave her hospital bed 5 months after discharge.
FLORIDA FRIDAY - Floridaman seals $600k worth of potatoes. Florida woman refuses to leave her hospital bed for 5 months despite being discharged. Flor...
Thief used Google Translate to rob a Peruvian restaurant. Hittler runs against Zielinski for mayor in France.
Thief used Google Translate to rob a restaurant. In a town in France, Hittler is running against Zielinksi for mayor. Would you try the newest kind of...
Study shows 19 million Americans think of shooting someone. Inject the fat of a dead person into your face or your chest, it's cool.
New technology allows plastic surgeons to inject you with the fat of dead people. The bear on the Bernese coat of arms gets to keep it's little red pe...
Deaf woman removed from plan for "not listening". Tourist sues NYC taqueria for salsa being too spicy.
Pot smoking linked to bigger brains and better cognitive functions later in life. German tourist sues a NYC taco restaurant for salsa that is too spic...
Man falls into a hole with a bear inside. Kickboxer pulls a car using his testicles.
Man in Japan fell into a hole with a bear inside. Marathon runners are churning butter as they run. Kickboxer pulls a car using just his testicles.
Floridaman prisoner escapes to have sex in a Porta Potty. Did a Floridaman really get kidnapped by dolphins?
FLORIDA FRIDAY - Floridaman prisoner snuck away from jail work duties to have sex in a porta potty. Drunk butt-tattoo'd Florida lady gives police Q-ti...
Man caught smuggling 2,000 queen ants in his pants. Stoners buy cookies, the Girl Scouts learn.
Chinese man caught smuggling 2,000 queen ants via Kenya. Girlscouts realize teaming up with a weed dispensary equals cookie sales. Canadian officials...
Braindead woman wakes up when her ambulance hits a pothole. "Literally Anybody Else" is running for mayor in Texas.
Irish woman awarded damages after her boss repeatedly yelled, "Potato" at her. "Literally Anyone Else" runs for mayor of a Texas town. Braindead woman...
Testical covers are banned from saunas in Japan. Flamingos kidnapped at the Flamingo Hotel in Vegas.
In-sauna testical covers are being banned in Japan. Tourist arrested after kidnapping and torturing a flamingo at The Flamingo in Las Vegas. Police wa...
Floridaman throws cremated ashes onto the NASCAR racetrack. Floridaman does other Floridaman things.
FLORIDA FRIDAY - Floridaman uses taco seasoning packets to steal Pokemon cards worth thousands. Florida woman with no right hand is ticketed for drivi...
Smoking crack helped him quit heroin, says Billy Idol. Old male whales are better at mating because they're better at singing.
Study shows: older male whales are better at procreating because they are better at singing. Billy Idol says smoking crack helped him quit heroin. Gen...
Woman declared dead 4 times by government since 2017. Polymarket no longer allows betting on nuclear armageddon.
Dallas woman declared dead 4 times since 2017. Convicted serial stowaway gets caught again sneaking on a flight to Europe. Polymarket betting co. remo...
Lady arrested for singing a remix of the national anthem at karaoke. Scientists created popcorn flavored tomatoes.
Woman arrested for disrespecting the national anthem at karaoke night. Scientists created tomatoes that smell just like popcorn. Government hotline gi...
Man claims world's smallest penis and is accepting challengers (with pics). Illinois will vote on Italian Beef as official state sandwich.
Illinois state sandwich will switch to the Italian Beef sandwich after a vote in the house. Georgia man found competent to stand trial despite removin...